Praying in Taiwan

Thank you SO much for your prayers and encouragement before and during our trip to Taiwan. We are still adjusting to the time change and fighting off some cold bugs right now. But all in all, we're thrilled to have had such a wonderful trip!

I am so grateful for the opportunity that we had as a family to visit my unsaved family overseas and share the love of Christ with them. Some verses that Jonah and I are memorizing from his My ABC Bible Verses book helped us witness to my family.

"Even a child is known by his deeds." Prov. 20:11
"For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." John 3:16
"Go unto all the world and preach the gospel to every creature." Mark 16:15
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Phil. 4:13
"Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth and the life. . . ." John 14:6
"Keep your tongue from evil." Psalm 34:13
"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." Matt. 5:16
"My little children, let us not love only in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth." 1 John 3:18

My aunts noticed Jonah's good behavior and asked us when we started training him. I said, "since 5 months." I told my mom to tell her sister that we discipline him according to the Bible and we ask God for wisdom and guidance on how to train and discipline him, because it's not always easy and we don't always do the right thing. We discipline him out of love and with the rod of correction because the Bible tells us that is how we are to discipline. She said that I should e-mail and tell them so they won't think it's my mother saying those things and not me. Who knows how much they understood. They know more English than they can speak, so they may have understood us.

An example of lack of discipline was apparent in my 2nd cousin, Sun Wei, who's 5 yrs. old. He would not obey his parents or his grandparents or much of anyone. He did however see that he couldn't get away with that misbehavior with Greg and me, so he shaped up and didn't try things with us after he saw how we reacted. He was jealous of Jonah at times because Jonah was getting all the attention for his cute giggle and his happy behavior. But he knew that he better not hurt Jonah, because everyone loved Jonah and he'd be in big trouble if he even acted like he would hurt him. They played well together, and Jonah appreciated it when Sun Wei fed him his fried rice in the car. They were riding with my mom and her sister (their grandmothers, respectively) while Greg and I were riding in another car getting a little rest during the drive. Jonah didn't want the adults to feed him, only Sun Wei. So I made a point to thank him in Chinese (in the language he would understand) for feeding Jonah his fried rice and doing something good, since I ignored his annoying behavior. He smiled and said, "How!" Which means, "Good!" or like he understood that I was thanking him.

The trip had so many opportunities to show Christ's love in our actions, not just our words. We were definitely not perfect, though. At times we snapped at each other or argued about packing or what we were doing or whatever, but we apologized and stopped and took time to pray. When I saw myself stressing and arguing and complaining, I knew I needed to pray. I knew I wasn't focused on Christ, but on myself or on the things in front of me. He helped me to get the focus back on things above and not on things below.

Here's an excerpt from an e-mail I wrote to my friend, Celena Schnake, the night before we flew back from Taiwan.

"We've had a wonderful trip, and I was even able to share the Bible verses with Amma and pray over her. She didn't hear me pray, since I was whispering, but I know that she saw and felt me praying. Before I shared w/ her, I was sad and crying when we visited, but afterward, I had a peace and joy in my heart. The next day and each time later when I saw her, she was happy and I was always happy and not crying. It's good b/c she doesn't want to see us cry. We were praying for you and your family and I know you and others were praying for us, b/c I could feel it. when I didn't have time to read my Bible, I was stressed and worried, but when I took the time to have my QT and pray alone or w/ Jonah or w/ Greg, I could feel the prayers of everyone. "

After sharing with Amma, I knew that even though I didn't hear her speak the words aloud that she confesses Jesus Christ as Lord and believes it in her heart, I knew that the Holy Spirit would intercede where I fell short. At first we were sitting on the couch and everyone was around talking and it was distracting. I kept holding her hand and whispering to her. "San Dei ai ni." ("God loves you.") she smiled and said, "Wo ai ni." ("I love you.") to me, because she probably thought I said "I love you" to her. I knew that was not the time to share the Bible verses with her. I kept praying for the right opportunity, and I didn't know if it would be that day.

Later, Amma wanted to take a nap because she was very weak and coughing up blood, so some of my cousins and I were with her in her room just a few feet away from the couches where others were talking and playing, and we had a chance to just sit with her. I kept gently, very lightly, caressing her legs to comfort her and just prayed in my heart. I prayed for peace for her and that the pain would go away and that God would comfort her. Later I prayed over her in a whisper, and she saw me and heard me, but didn't say anything to me. Just smiled at me. My cousins were up and down giving her "holy water" from Buddha for her lips and medicine, since her mouth was dry and bleeding, and they would translate things for me at times. I asked if my eldest cousin told Amma what it was that I tried to tell her for 2 days, but it was translated wrong. I said, "I'm so glad that Jonah is able to meet Amma because she is my favorite Amma." My aunt translated to Amma something that wasn't quite right and Amma said, "It's okay." and looked sad. Later I found out from my cousin's husband that my aunt told her that I'm sorry that we can't stay because Jonah has to take a nap." It was completely different, so I was concerned about translating the verses I wanted to share with her.

I just kept sitting with her and being with her, and Amma asked me if I wanted to go sit and talk with the others out in the living room, but I said, "no, I want to be with you, I came here to see you and spend time with you." So my cousin translated. She said, "oh." and nodded and held my hand. They keep telling me that Amma is happy to see us and that everybody is here to see her. But she knows that this is the last time that she will see me. I thought, well, not necessarily, but then, agreed as more tears fell from my eyes. I asked my eldest cousin if she told Amma what I said about Jonah, that I'm so happy that Jonah can meet Amma because she is my favorite Amma and she said, "yes, I told her." and it's as if Amma understood, because she smiled and said something like she was so glad to meet Jonah too.

Then, I had the Holy Spirit's prompting, and I asked my eldest cousin if she would translate for me to Amma. I told her I want to speak to her in Mandarin, so could she please translate in Taiwanese. My two other younger cousins were there listening (they're both in college and have very good English, but don't speak it as much). I began in Mandarin, and the words, were in my voice, but they were clearer and more powerful than I've ever recited these verses before. It was definitely the Holy Spirit speaking through me. I'll write in English, here what I said in Mandarin to Amma.

"Amma, God loves the people of the world so much that he gave his only son to us that if we believe in Him, we will not die, but have life that never ends. We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him and who have been called according to His purpose."

Amma listened as she laid back and sighed and said, "Ahh..." My eldest cousin said to her in Taiwanese, "Do you understand?" and Amma said, "Yes, I do." And all three cousins had tears in their eyes and just paused and looked at Amma.

--Mandarin is their first language and I know that at least two of them have heard about Jesus before, because the eldest one studied for 2 years at the Christian college where my mom graduated in Texas and my other cousin attends a Catholic University now. But they never asked me about it, and knew that they could. I continue to pray for them and their families. I see the despair in their faces and they're so sad that Amma is dying. I'm sad too, because I'll miss her, but I'm happy that I've had the chance to know her and that Jonah has had the chance to meet her and spend good time with her laughing and clapping hands and hugging and doing the forehead to forehead kisses.--

Then, she took my hand and just held it. I had tears in my eyes, but a smile on my face, because they were tears of joy. A few minutes later she asked if I was hungry (in Taiwanese) and I said, "no, I'm okay, thank you." and then Jonah woke up from his nap and crawled up to her bed and stood there on the side and smiled and babbled to her, she asked if Jonah needed to sleep. I said, "no, he's fine. he slept already. now he's awake." My cousin came back to the bed and translated what we just said, and she was surprised that Amma and I understood each other, and my other cousin was telling me that the way Amma and I communicate is through hearts. She was always concerned about others, not herself. That's how she's been all her life. She has such a heart for others, and I pray that she has a humble heart to know that she needs a Savior.

I've prayed for Amma for years, since I was in college and I was so worried that she wouldn't hear the gospel and that she'd die before she'd be able to accept Jesus in her heart. But now I know that it's not only up to my strength or my power. It's between her and God. He knows her heart and He can open it up for her to receive him. I won't know until heaven if she's saved, but God has granted me the peace that transcends all understanding and guards our hearts and our minds in Christ Jesus.

It's amazing how God used the 2 verses that I memorized in Chinese nearly 10 years ago to share the gospel with my Amma. One night when I was home from college, my mom and I stayed up late reading our Bibles, hers in Chinese and English and mine in English, both NIV, and she recorded John 3:16 and Romans 8:28 on my cell phone memo recording, so I could play it back and hear her inflection and pronunciation. Since Jonah's been born, I've told him those two verses in Chinese followed by the English for each and I hope that he'll later recognize and memorize those verses. My mom wanted to memorize Psalm 23 in Chinese so if ever she was on a plane that was about to crash, she could say it out loud so others could hear. So I read it to her in English, verse by verse and she recorded my English and her Chinese in between each verse. It was a special time reading my Bible with my mom. I'm so glad we had this opportunity to go to Taiwan together with our husbands and Jonah and spend time with her family and meet other relatives.

P.S. Jonah did so well on the flight. He had a fever the morning that we left for about 24 hours, but it helped him to sleep, though he was so hot and lethargic and didn't want anyone to hold him but his mother. It was exhausting for me at first, but later it was wonderful when everyone wanted to hold him and take pictures of him and wow, it was like the Taiwanese paparazzi. Everywhere we'd go, people were taking pictures and saying how cute he is (in Mandarin) and of course he's learned that phrase "hen ke ai" ("so cute") by now. Girls wanted to pose with him to take pictures on their cell phones and even stopped to give him a balloon in the mall, and we even saw the Taiwan President Elect, Ma Ying-jeou, on the High Speed Rail (HSR) on May 16. He and all his secret service. We were on the train first, and then these 20 men in suits with ear buds marched in and looked at us and sat down all around us. My aunt told me that that's her new president. Jonah was fussy and needed to go to the toilet, so my aunt and I went to take him, and one of the secret service men said to her, "please make your baby stop crying, the president is disturbed." She said, "He's not even the president yet, and he's already making demands." And then the man felt bad and my aunt asked me if I wanted to change his diaper there, in the seats, but I said, "No, he needs to use the toilet." I mean, the diaper was clean and dry. He held it until the toilet. So the man smiled at me and moved out of the way and kindly let us through. There was a crowd of people just outside of our car trying to catch a glimpse of the new president. It was a nice story to tell our relatives as we met them, and later when I saw him on TV on May 20 during his inaugural press conference, I recognized him. Even though I couldn't quite see his face at first, though he sat 2 rows directly in front of me. He probably wasn't bothered by Jonah's fussing at all, because he didn't say anything to the men about it. Probably that secret service man was trying to please his boss, though it was a terrible first impression on the new president of Taiwan for these Americans.

I'll try to post pictures in the days ahead. There are so many to wade through and our camera broke at the War and Peace Memorial in Kaohsiung when I dropped it on the concrete. So, I'll try to get the ones that I have online to share.

Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow. Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights.

30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge for Wives‏: Day 10

Day Ten:"Behold you are handsome, my beloved! Yes, pleasant!..." Song of Solomon 1:16a

We all crave appreciation. We want to know that we are valued and loved. Early love letters probably reflected our admiration, but if we're not careful, our spouse will forget why we were drawn to him. If you still have any of your old love letters, re-read them for clues to deepen your current level of appreciation for your spouse.

When we spend time criticizing our husbands, we lose time that could be spent admiring them. As you consider various ways to encourage your husband, ask, "How can I admire him?"
Does your husband know that you think he is attractive? What was one of the characteristics in your husband that first drew you to him? Was it a physical characteristic, or something else?

Was it his gentle, compassionate eyes? Kindness or concern for others? An easy-going confidence? A steadiness that comes from trusting in the Lord? Strength of character in a culture that lacks integrity? Do you see at least a glimpse of that characteristic in him today? Whatever it is, tell him!

How appropriate when my husband is home early from work today not feeling well. He just wanted to rest and I told him that I'm feeling great so I can take care of him. Isn't it amazing how God knows just what we need and when we need it? He needed Greg to slow down and me to comfort and love on him. Wow! That's an answered prayer we had about our marriage. God is SO good!

Cruising, crawling...I can't keep up!

Jonah at 10 months.

Jonah's been crawling for almost a month now, and today, I think he's doing double time! I mean, one second he's sitting down, playing with the truck, and the next 2 seconds, he's 10 ft. away standing up at the window looking outside. This time of his life is so fun for me, and for him too! He loves going where he wants to go, for the most part, and chasing Chuy (our dog) on his hands and one knee and one foot usually. He's like Curious George in all that he's discovering and learning and doing. He just won't sit still!

It's hard to get him to sit still for a picture.

Standing in his Easter suit.

Reading about what Jesus did.

Bowtie Eggs 1

Bowtie Eggs 2

Bowtie Pup

Bowtie Eggs 3

Bowtie Eggs 4

These were our attempt to take pics in his Easter suit (that he didn't wear to church because it was too cold outside). I think we'll have to go into a studio and get the free 8x10. Anyway, we're enjoying every minute of his new mobility! He's playing everything he can like a percussion instrument and loves to dance to the rhythm. Can't wait to see how he'll react to all their is to discover at the Children's Museum. We're planning to go tomorrow.

At least he's still napping twice a day. He doesn't want to nap, but he learns to obey Mommy. He's just about too big for the infant bathtub, but I didn't want to put him in the big tub yet. Greg just bought some tub gripper strips to help him from slipping and sliding in the tub. We may try the big tub tonight. I guess it's me who doesn't want to believe that he's growing that fast! Still nursing, but during the day he's running around so much that he doesn't want to stop for more than 2 min. to nurse. I guess that's good if I'm planning to wean him in a year. It's just hard for me realizing that he's growing up and doesn't need me as much anymore as his desire for independence is increasing with every "step" he takes.


I have a renewed sense of joy and confidence as I stay home with Jonah. I told Greg the other day, "Thank you for letting me stay home with Jonah." I know it's my calling and I'm so glad that it's part of God's design. I have a peace about it and working outside the home is the farthest thing from my mind. I'd miss watching him grow and learn and discover! Praise God for his design for mothers and fathers and families. He had such a perfect plan, and when we try to follow it, we can see the joy that was meant for us, without sin.

30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge for Wives‏: Day 9

Christ is Risen! He is Risen Indeed!

We are so blessed to have a Savior who would choose to die for the sins of the world. He has overcome death in victory and we celebrate his resurrection on this Easter day. Praise God that we have eternal life in Jesus if we ask Him to come into our hearts and personally forgive our sins past, present, and future. When we do that, we can live with God in heaven for eternity because Jesus paid the cost!

Day Nine:"...be swift to hear, slow to speak..." James 1:19b

We are often so busy speaking that we don't take time to listen. We are so quick to offer a comment - negative or positive - that we don't really "hear" our husband's heart. Remember: we have two ears and only one mouth. We need to listen more!

As you continue in your 30-day challenge, not speaking negatively and focusing on positive encouragement, hear the Lord's admonition today: "Be swift to hear."

If listening is a real problem for you, play a game with yourself. See if you can listen to your husband for one whole day, only speaking when asked a question. If your husband notices the difference, explain that you are learning to listen more-not only to God, but also to him.

One easy way to express admiration for your husband is to ask a question about something he enjoys, and then listen to his response. If it's an area of personal familiarity, keep asking questions until you learn something you didn't know, then tell him, "Wow, I didn't know that!"

This is a timely lesson for me. Wow, this challenge has met me right where I need it most each day I post. How's that for the Lord's leading?! I'll see if I can swallow my pride, and close my mouth more often and open my ears. My husband is such a good listener, I should learn from scripture and give my husband the courtesy he gives me.

30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge for Wives‏: Day 8

Day Eight: How are you doing with the "30-Day Encouragement Challenge"? In case you've forgotten, here's the challenge:

* You can't say anything negative about your husband ...to your husband...or to anyone else, about your husband.* Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband...to your husband...and to someone else, about your husband!

"...but who can find a faithful man?" Prov. 20:6b

Faithfulness is a wonderful but rare quality today, especially in regard to marriage. Do you understand how important this quality is? Your challenge is to continue to root out all negative speaking, and plant seeds of encouragement instead. You may be amazed at what will grow.

Contemporary culture often entices men to be unfaithful to their wedding vows and spiritual commitments. Appreciate your husband's faithfulness - how he is loyal to you. Let him know that you are glad he has "stick-to-it-iveness" in your marriage. Appreciate his faithfulness to God. (If you have an unfaithful husband, this is a difficult area for you. Pray, speak the truth in love, remain faithful yourself, and discover ways to encourage faithfulness in your mate. The Bible says that husbands may "...be won by the conduct of their wives" [1 Pet. 3:1]. You may also want to seek counsel from a mature, godly individual or couple.)

Wow, what an answered prayer! How blessed I am to be married to such a wonderful man as my husband. He is so thoughtful that today, he stayed home doing taxes, so I could go shopping with Jonah. I'd been meaning to shop for a bathing suit (a Christmas present from Greg), and a dress and shoes for Easter (gifts from my mom), but have made several attempts and hadn't gotten into the dressing room to try these things on in weeks! So, after taking way too long to leave the house, leaving closer to Jonah's afternoon nap time, I was getting stressed that I won't even have time to shop for myself, so I should just go grocery shopping and forget about my clothes all together. Well, my wonderful, calm, patient, anchor-of-a-husband, helped me to calm down and just enjoy the time and not worry about Jonah's nap schedule, he needs to adapt.

Well, that was a great idea. But I tend to dottle, and by the time I got to the swimwear store (away from the mall, I thought I'd try out this store that my husband spotted and suggested I try), it was 3:05, and got Jonah in the stroller w/ diaper bag in hand and the store was closed...at 3:00 on Saturday. So I was discouraged, feeling like a failure when I try to accomplish so much and after running so many errands sometimes I feel like I didn't accomplish much of anything, but wasting gas and money since the prices are so high. So I drove toward the mall and realized that I needed to eat. I hadn't eaten enough today for the many times I had to nurse Jonah, so I stopped and got a steakburger. I really wanted a chocolate shake too, but I didn't think that would fare well in the dressing room trying on swimsuits and dresses. So I stuck to the essential nourishment. Then Jonah was so fussy, b/c we weren't going anywhere and he just had to get back in the car seat 3 min. after he thought he was going on an outing in his stroller. So I decided to take him back home so he could sleep in his crib for his nap, b/c he wasn't going to do well for me in the dressing rooms when he's already cranky and we haven't even gotten to the mall yet.

When I got home, my husband, who was doing taxes, was surprised to see me 30 min. later. So Jonah woke up from napping about 5 min. in the car and was not happy. When after putting him down, after trying to take him to the toilet and getting screams, and then in his crib, he almost turned purple from holding his breath from crying out of anger, I rocked him and he wanted to nurse again, 2 hours later! So I finally put him down for his nap, after taking him to the toilet. Poor guy, his schedule was all off. Greg came in and encouraged me, once again to go shopping and spend some time for myself. He said, "I'll stay home with the boy while he naps and I'll feed him a bottle when he wakes up, just go have a good time shopping." I was so thankful for my loving husband and for the time.

So, off to the mall I went. I was efficient, and had a great time, got a dress, shoes, bathing suit, and was going to head to Wal-Mart for some groceries. When I heard a message on the radio talking about "the crazy cycle...without love, she reacts without respect...without respect, he reacts without love...." and I realized how important it is for our husbands to hear how much we respect them, when we're probably telling them how much we love them, and they know it. They don't need to hear it several times a day, but we women need the reassurance of the love our husbands have for us. So I decided to get just bananas (we were out, and the other items on the list could wait until I go grocery shopping next week) at Kroger (on the way home), and come home. I called Greg 5 min. after telling him I was on my way to Wal-Mart and said, "don't make anything, I want to come home and make you a good dinner, because I love you so much for taking care of Jonah for me. I have this good fish I want to make you and veggies, so just let me come home and make it for you. I'm getting bananas and I'll be home soon." He said, "okay, I'll feed Jonah his dinner, but I'll wait for you."

When I got home, at 7:30, he and Jonah were at the table, he snacking on pretzels and cheese, and Jonah eating a great, Mommy-approved dinner. He rushed to the door to help me with my bags and I said, "Oh, thank you. Honey...I respect you." He smiled and said, "I love you." He said he got hungry, but he'd eat whatever I cooked for dinner. I rushed to put the Talapia in the oven and the broccoli and cheese and potatoes on the stove and decided to try on my new dress and do a fashion show for Greg and Jonah while the food was cooking. They loved the dress and shoes and as we were chatting and distracted, Jonah wanted me to stay there and not keep disappearing to the room to change, I realized that I didn't stir the broccoli and potatoes and they burned! I was so disappointed. I completely forgot to stir it after setting the timer for the fish. Greg was so encouraging and said, "Don't worry, Honey, I'll eat it. It's alright." The potatoes could be saved but the broccoli was definitely charred.

So I changed clothes fast and by then the fish was done and Jonah was fussing wondering where Mommy was. Greg took the fish out and calmed Jonah down, and when I came back in normal clothes, I noticed some perfect broccoli and cheese on the stove. He had made more for me while I changed. What a sweet guy! :)

My husband knows when I just can't handle it anymore and I need him to remind me that we're a team. I know God brought us into each other's lives to balance each other out and encourage one another. I need to remember to show him respect and love, by respecting his time, his hard work, his rest, his activities, his needs. I'm so grateful that I have a loving husband who wants to lead and love his wife, and Christ loves the church.

30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge for Wives: Day 7

Day Seven:"Do not overwork to be rich; because of your own understanding, cease!...for riches certainly make themselves wings..." Prov. 23:4-5
"That I may cause those who love me to inherit wealth, that I may fill their treasuries." Proverbs 8:21

Money is the root of much marital discord. Ask yourself, "Am I being negative toward my husband in the area of finances?" Determine not to speak evil of your husband in this area. Discover ways to encourage and help him instead.

Does your husband handle finances wisely? Does he make good financial investments, based on biblical principles? Does he have a budget? Does he make wise decisions about purchases - checking many sources before he buys? Is he a good steward of his money before the Lord? Let him know how much you appreciate his strengths in financial matters.

If he is weak in this area, encourage any good decisions that he does make. Perhaps you can help him, if he's open to the idea, by organizing financial files or providing other practical assistance. Or, if he wants you to handle the finances, ask for his input before you make decisions that will affect him.

30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge for Wives‏: Day 6

Day Six:"...whatever ye do, do all to the glory of God." 1 Cor. 10:31b

Do you recognize and appreciate your husband's creativity? Or do you criticize and demean his efforts? Instead of negativity, determine to be positive. Perhaps you can help your husband see that his efforts are an opportunity to glorify God.

Is your husband the "creative" type? Does he have any artistic gifts? What is that special "knack" he has? Affirm him for his handiwork - a hobby, music, gardening, tinkering with cars, working with wood, etc. Remember: Even if he doesn't measure up to your standards, praise his efforts.

If your budget allows, buy him a book or magazine that will continue to encourage his special skill or talent. If you have a hard time finding his "creative side," understand that men's creativity sometimes is related to their work. Find something he does to make his job run more smoothly or something he does that adds value to his work...and let him know that you have noticed. Make his day...Praise his accomplishments in public, while he is listening.

What an encouragement to me in today's challenge! I was feeling bad for not being perfect about not saying anything negative and holding my tongue, because I slipped a few times these last couple days. But today's challenge reminds me how important words of affirmation are to my husband, since it's probably his primary love language. He loves hearing praise about his work and his brilliant ideas. He's so creative with the computer and creating presentations and graphics that are pleasing to the eye and professional and convey the message at hand. He's been working so hard on his presentation for a meeting that he's facilitating today in Cincinnati. Last night when I saw the final product, I was so impressed and wowed by his work. I told him how much his boss and the company will appreciate it and they'll be looking to him for more ingenius ideas and quality creations like that.

I praise God for my husband for the way he works so hard to strive for perfection. Even when 80% is good enough for everyone else, he won't settle for less. I think that's something that God placed in his heart, because he's always been that way. We've been praying for him to get enough rest for the drive and for alertness on the roads and in the meetings. And this morning, he woke up refreshed and rejuvinated and ready to go. God is good and He answers prayers. He can give us the strength when we are weak and the wisdom and guidance when we don't know which direction to go. All we have to do is ask with a humble heart and listen to His voice. I pray that I will humbly go to Christ with my prayers and requests with thanksgiving, instead of trying to do it on my own, and in my own way. May I relinquish total control to Him daily in everything.

30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge for Wives: Day 5

Day Five:"Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers." Eph. 4:29

Another way to describe the positive side of this "30-Day Encouragement Challenge" is by using the word "edify," which means, "to build up." Negative comments only discourage and tear down. Positive comments encourage and build.

Do you edify your husband before others, adding to his value in their eyes? This is especially important to other family members.

Do you praise your husband to his relatives, and yours? Does your husband's mother know how much you love him? How about your dad? Perhaps you can drop a word of praise into a conversation or letter. Be creative in letting your relatives know that you respect your husband, love him, and support him - in spite of whatever flaws and weaknesses he may have.

This was a great day to read today, after getting back from my trip to New York. It was hard for me and for Jonah to be away from his daddy for 6 days, but I enjoyed edifying my husband to my mother. I need to edify him more to his mother and to my dad though.

Greg was SO wonderful that he drove 1500 miles to pick us up. My mom and I had to drive through the snow storm a couple weeks ago, to get to her house in Bloomingburg, NY. It was hard on Jonah, but especially hard on us who had to stay alert and awake while driving. Jonah soon adapted to the new house, but didn't sleep through the night any night. He always woke up for whatever reason and wanted to nurse. Maybe because his play pen was in guest room where I was sleeping, and when he woke in the middle of the night, he smelled that his mommy was near and wanted me to comfort him.



We were planning to meet Greg halfway new Youngstown, OH last Sunday, but I just didn't see that plan working out. Since he's one man driving alone, he'll get there much faster than two women and a 9 month old who need to stop frequently for restroom and food breaks. So, after exhausting all the possibilities we could think of, Greg decided that he'd drive to NY on Saturday, possibly stay one night in my mom's house, and drive back to Indiana on Sunday, so he could return to work on Monday. We actually ended up driving 3 more hours back toward Indiana on Saturday night, and started out our trip with Jonah sleeping. That worked out well. However, as soon as we were in the hotel, Jonah was back to clinging to mommy and not sleeping. I must have nursed him three times that night (from 1 am until 7:30 am) and Greg ended up sleeping in the other bed (the one we made up for Jonah).

Thankfully, we got home on Sunday evening about 5:30 pm. Greg made great time on the road and our only delay was on I-70 when the highway was blocked in both directions because a plane, something like a Cessna, was trying to take off from the interstate. We knew it would be on the news, and it was. I didn't hear the whole story, but it took off from Eagle Creek and "ran out of options" so it landed on the highway. I wonder what the drivers of the vehicles thought when they were driving along and suddenly they saw an airplane land on the road in front of them. We got to see two helicopters circling about 3 miles ahead of us and finally the plane took off. Didn't get any photos, but we'll remember this one.

So we made great time and when we got home, I was SO thankful for my loving husband who drove all the way to New York for 1500 miles to bring Jonah and me home safely. We're still recovering from the travel and lack of sleep, and Jonah's back to sleeping through the night.

Edifying others and building each other up-- that's what I need to do more often. Not let any unwholesome talk come out of my mouth. That was the verse I kept thinking about when I was away from home and when it was easy to complain when I was sleep deprived. That verse, and Do everything without complaining or disputing. I know Jonah watches everything I do, and my mother too, she noticed how we train Jonah and pray with him and how we teach him. He needed constistent training and he needed his daddy too. I think he wondered why we only talked to Daddy on the phone, because he'd wake up every morning saying, "dadadada." So we'd call Daddy and say good morning. It's interesting, because he says "mamahh" to Greg all the time and to me when he's hungry, but it seems like what I hear all day long is "dadadada" or "bababababa" among other babblings. He's our precious boy and we're delighted to have him as our son.

30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge for Wives‏: Day 4

Today's challenge is a great one for me. I need to remember how hard my husband works to provide for our family, because it is created in is core to be the provider. This challenge to not speak negatively to or about or to others about our husbands is a good one. I realize when I start to say something that could become negative, it's not edifying and not productive, and it becomes complaining. Philippians 2:14 says, "Do everything without complaining or arguing..." If I'm teaching my son this verse, I better learn it and practice it first!

He may be only 9 months old, but he notices everything and learns from what I do and how my husband and I talk with each other, interact, love each other. It's so vital that I am kind and respectful and admirable of my husband so that my children learn to do so as well. Even when my husband loves me and honors me and protects me, Jonah's learning to do that too. God gave us such a wonderful design in His Word. We have to keep looking there for the instruction and for the guidance and direction we ask for.

May our husbands feel encouraged by our words.

Day Four:"...let him labor, working with his hands what is good..." Eph. 4:28

We are all accountable for the things we say, both negative and positive words. Have you embraced the challenge to speak only positive things to your husband and to others about him? Here's a suggestion that touches the core of your husband's world.

Some women take their husband's career for granted, and they show it in many ways. Do you "dump" on your husband at the end of the workday, or do you strengthen and encourage him with your words? A wise wife will make her husband feel that she values and appreciates his work. Let him know that you are glad he is a hard worker. Take opportunities to praise his diligence and resourcefulness to others.

If your husband is out of work, unable to work, or refuses to work, you'll need to be more creative. Praise him for a character quality that you see in him that would be a vital part of a successful career - such as persistence, decisiveness, strength, an analytical mind, organizational skills, good with people, good listener, determination, etc.

30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge for Wives: Day 3

Happy Valentine's Day!

My mom drove in from New York today to visit us and babysit Jonah so Greg and I can have a date on Valentine's Day. I miss my mom SO much, since I didn't get to see her at Christmas. I'm so glad that she's here. Jonah and I are going to drive to New York with my mom next week and we'll be back the following weekend. We'll miss Daddy, but he's going to meet us halfway for the trip back.

How appropriate that today's challenge is about loving our husbands and letting them love us.
Hope you have a wonderful day in Christ's love.

Day Three:"...love suffers long, and is kind..." 1 Cor. 13:4

"And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."
Phil. 4:19

Love indeed suffers long and is kind. As you consider your Encouragement Challenge, determine today that you will not say anything negative to or about your husband. Speak kindly to him with words of genuine encouragement.

If your husband is considerate of your needs, let him know that you have noticed. Thank him for his kindness and consideration. Thank the Lord that your husband knows how to be both tough and tender.

Sometimes it's difficult for a man to be gentle, kind or tender - especially if he hasn't had role models in these areas. If he's not a considerate person, appeal to him for help without complaining. Let him know that it's hard for you to handle some things alone. Then, when he moves in to help, don't insist that he do it your way. Be glad that he is responding, and express your gratitude.

Ultimately, you can't expect your husband to make you feel more secure, loved, etc. Remember that only God can meet the deepest needs of your heart.

30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge for Wives: Day 2

Eventhough I'm already behind schedule for this 30 day challenge, I wanted to post it as I'm able to read it. I'm not online everyday, so when I am, I'll post that day's challenge. I have to admit that I already broke the goal of not saying anything negative to my husband, today. I just lost my temper when we were running late to a party, and got short with him. But I do remember the encouragement, that my friend told me in her e-mail, "you don't have to be perfect," so I'm going on that note and getting right back on track again. I try to apologize for my mistakes and add some encouraging words. Maybe I'll get used to the positives and hold my tongue before the negatives come out. It has been better for my heart to take those thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5). It's a daily lesson and a daily reminder, but I'm determined to do it!

Here goes for day 2. It's late and the day is about over, so I'll sleep on this one and try to practice it tomorrow. We have a busy day with Jonah's 9 month pictures after church and it's supposed to be subzero wind chill tomorrow, so we'll just have to bundle everyone up. This one will be a challenge for me, because when it's cold, I tend to complain. So I'll have to work really hard to be positive!

Day Two:"...through love serve one another." Gal. 5:13b
How did you do yesterday with your first day of blessing and encouraging your husband? Was it easy? Was it hard to hold your tongue when you wanted to say something negative? We hope you're off to a good start. (If you blew it, don't give up - start again today!) There are so many practical things you can praise, if you look for them.

Today, find some way that your husband is serving you or your family. Does he help around the house? Take care of the car? Fix things that are broken? If your budget allows, give him a new, small tool with a big bow attached. But make sure he doesn't think it's part of a "Honey Do" list!

Maybe your husband's not a handyman, but does he run errands for you? Let you go first? Take care of you when you are sick? Help you make decisions? Praise him for his willingness to serve others. Let him know that you see his unique service as a great strength.

30-Day Husband Encouragement Challenge for Wives: Day 1

A friend of mine e-mailed me this 30-day challenge for wives to encourage their husbands on January 1st, 2008. Since January was such a rough month in the Bayman household, I wasn't able to participate. Now that I'm able to read my messages, I asked her if she could send it all to me at once, and she did. So I'm going to try to post one each day for 30 days to remind myself and encourage anyone else who's reading this blog to be a blessing in their home as well.

How appropriate for reading day 1 today, since yesterday, I wasn't particularly encouraging to my husband. Who more should we encourage than the man we love who takes care of us and leads our home and provides for our family? Well, here it is, and I will try to remember day 1 for the rest of my days!

Day One:
"The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life." Prov. 31:11-12

To refresh your memory...here's the 30-Day Encouragement Challenge...for the next 30 days:* You can't say anything negative about your husband ...to your husband...or to anyone else, about your husband.* Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband...to your husband...and to someone else, about your husband!

To help you get started, have you ever thanked your husband for "choosing you" above all other women? He found you attractive as a person, and appreciated you. Though many circumstances in your marriage may have changed, let your husband know that you are glad God led you together, and that you want to be a blessing to him for the rest of your marriage. Let him know that he can trust you to be in his corner.

One of the best opportunities to express your gratitude is first thing in the morning. How do you greet your husband each morning? Is he confident in your love? Give him a "wake up call" that he'll never forget-a big "I love you" and an "I'm so glad I'm your wife!"

Encouraging Words

Oh, how grateful I am for the women in my Bible study. Their words, prayers and advice are so encouraging to me. This spring, I'm in a weekly Bible study at our church called, The Mission of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson. Praying with these women that I haven't met before and hearing their stories about rearing their children reminds me that I'm not alone, and I'm doing a good thing, staying home and raising my son.

Occaisionally, we receive handouts that are quotes, stories, reminders, or just fun things to read and laugh about. This week, one in particular spoke to my heart. Whenever I have doubts in my mind or if I'm questioning the idea of a career over personally raising my children, I want to remember God's design for mothers and His intent for the role in which He has placed me.

Continue On

A woman once fretted over the usefulness of her life.

She feared she was easting her potential being a devoted wife

and mother: She wondered if the time and energy she invested in

her husband and children would make a difference.

At times she got discouraged because so much of what she did

seemed to go unnoticed and unappreciated.

"Is it worth it?" she often wondered.

"Is there something better that I could be doing with my time?"

It was during one of these moments of questioning that she heard

the still small voice of her heavenly Father speak to her heart.

"You are a wife and mother because that

is what I have called you to be.

Much of what you do is hidden from the public eye. But I notice.

Most of what you give is done without remuneration.

But I am your reward.

Your husband cannot be the man I have called him to be without

your support. Your influence upon him is greater than you think

and more powerful than you will ever know. I bless him

through your service and honor him through your love.

Your children are precious to Me.

Even more precious than they are to you.

I have entrusted them to your care to raise for Me.

What you invest in them is an offering to Me.

You may never be in the public spotlight.

But your obedience shines as a bright light before Me. Continue on.

Remember you are my servant. Do all to please Me."

-by Roy Lessin

In a world where nothing is good enough, fast enough, expensive enough, easy enough, I want to drown out all that is unedifying and degrading to the example of a marriage, a family, and parenthood. I won't settle for leaving my children behind to fend for themselves and to be raised by the media and the evils in this world. I will stand by my husband and support him, encourage him, and help him by nurturing my family and taking care of the little ones that our heavenly Father has entrusted to us.

He never said it would be easy, but I know where I can find my strength.

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

- Philippians 4:13

Feeling Better

Jonah at 8 months

It's nice to be online again. Poor Greg had bronchitis for 2 weeks before going to the dr. and I was trying to take care of him and keep Jonah away from the coughs so he wouldn't catch it. Well, I was getting fatigued taking care of husband, baby, and dog, (thankfully, I didn't get sick), that I had to ask Greg to take Jonah to the toilet once and to watch him for about an hour while I tried to rest.

We were doing so well with the handwashing (so much that my hands and Jonah's were getting dry) that Jonah wasn't sick. Well, after hanging out with Daddy, who was still very sick, Jonah caught what Greg had, 102.1 fever, coughs, sneezes, fatigue. Poor baby. This is his first fever of his life. I'd never felt him that hot before. I took him to the dr. the day I felt his fever (last Wed.), and they checked that it wasn't pneumonia and he had no ear infection. Thank goodness! Greg had bronchitis in college, and I had pneumonia when I was three years old, so I wanted to be sure that Jonah was checked out early. The dr. recommended a humidifier, rest, plenty of fluids, Tylenol for the fever, and a lot of love.

His fever was down in less than 24 hours (Thurs.), and we spent most of the day just cuddling. Poor Jonah was so limp, he couldn't even hold his body up. He just wanted me to hold him and comfort him in his pain and finally laid down in his crib for one nap in the afternoon. Greg went to work that day, and then to the medcheck that night. They ruled out the flu, prescribed some meds and told him not to go to work on Friday. Soon, he got his appetite back, and on Friday, Jonah was eating back to normal. He still has a bit of a cough, but I've been keeping him indoors when it's super cold out, like today.

We took it easy last weekend too, and only ventured out to get his new carseat. He was 21 lbs. at the dr. and I was sure he'd be 22 lbs. by next month. Well, I didn't want to wait any longer to get his car seat. He'd already been uncomfortable in his infant carrier, and I think he didn't like being in that slouched position and all buckled in. So I was glad he was doing better since I wanted to see the seat before buying it. We were going to get it online, but got a better deal at Babies' R Us with the 15% off coupon. We got a Britax Boulevard for the side impact protection, and Jonah LOVES it! He sleeps in it while driving and rests his head on the side wings. He's our precious cargo, and we want to protect him as much as we can.

We went swimming on Wed. while it was 52 degrees out. He was barely coughing the day before, so I thought we'd try it. We were both tired of being indoors all the time. He loves swimming at the Y, so we enjoyed the exercise. As soon as he started coughing, though, I said, it's time to get him out and back to rest. I didn't want him to overexhert himself. Maybe with subsequent children I won't be so cautious, but I don't like it when he's sick. I want to take care of him as best as I can. Afterall, he's our only son. :)

Back to blogging

It's been over a year since I blogged, and well, our son is 8 months old now! Last post I was reminiscing about the Rockappella concert where they brought me on stage during "My Girl" to sing to me a new song, "Oh, Pollyanna." I wasn't feeling so well then after having just been in the hospital for dehydration at 10 weeks prenatal. But now...I'm doing great! and Jonah is napping.

So to update you on the past year...

Jonah Taylor Bayman was born May 10, 2007 at 1:37 p.m. He weighed 8 pounds 2 ounces and was 20.5 inches long.

To see more photos of Jonah's first 6 months, visit our flickr site. http://www.flickr.com/photos/chuybay

He's just a joy to know and we love how he smiles, laughs, giggles, sings, dances, plays the piano, claps his hands, tries to crawl, loves to pet our dog Chuy and kiss our noses. Now kissing the nose, used to be biting it with his gums, but is now a bit painful with two teeth!

I'll try to keep blogging more regularly now. This past yr. has been a whirlwind with job changes and even trusting God to provide for us while living on savings for three months. We're so blessed that we had more time together as a family so Greg could spend more time with his son, and Jonah could enjoy Daddy time.

We started toilet training at 4 months and it wasn't easy, I admit.

Thanks to Greg being there to help me. Now Jonah tells us when he needs to use the toilet, but we are still learning to understand what he's telling us. Praying for wisdom as I continue this effort, since I don't always have the strength and energy to stop what I'm doing to take him to the toilet. It's worth it though since we're saving 1-3 diapers a day. Hopefully he'll start not wanting to wear the diapers anymore.

Rockapella sing

I know it's been a long time since I've posted anything on the blog, but I think it's about time to start up again. There's been a lot going on since March when I last posted the AKAfellas songs, so I'll just start with the most interesting events and fill in from there.

Greg heard that Rockapella was going to be in Indy again this October, so he and I and Paul & Leslie got tickets to go. Greg was coming back from a business trip after being gone all week, so I was really looking forward to seeing him. They performed at Hamilton Southeastern H.S. in Fishers, where lead singer, Scott Leonard's father is the former superintendant. The first time I saw Rockapella live was at Butler University at Clowes Hall in Indianapolis on Nov. 14, 2003. That was before Greg and I were engaged. We went with his quartet, the AKAfellas, and their respective wives/girlfriends/finacees. It was a fun time and a great performance by Rockapella. Anyway, I digress. Back to the concert in October.

So this was the first time for us to see the new group perform: the Three Tenors, Scott Leonard, Kevin Wright, and introducing John Brown, A.K.A. JB, and new bass, George Baldi, and their vocal percussionist, Jeff Thatcher. Of course we were impressed and just thought that getting some of their performance on video would be great. We had our little Casio Exilim digital camera that could capture as much movie and pics as there was room on the disc, so we started "filming" when they were singing "My Girl." Well, you can watch the rest. Anytime there's a break in the video, it's b/c Greg was taking a picture.

Songs

The AKAfellas recorded again in February to see how things have improved. Thanks to Scott Wilder, we mixed the songs, added reverb and put it on a CD. Greg's Grandma D'Ann loved hearing her grandson on the CD, since her son Chris Bayman is already a professional guitarist heading up the Chris Bayman Quartet.

I think this mix is good, though, keep in mind, singing is not their day job. They're 4 engineers who like to sing for fun. :) It was cool to hear them all on a CD too.

I wish I had a cool picture of them rehearsing, but since Scott's wife, Kathie, didn't think we could stay quiet enough, we went furniture shopping instead. However, Lori, Doug's wife, did get a picture of them rehearsing at their house way back when, and she's posted this pic on their myspace. Greg and I were there the following week to mix though, and that was like looking at their voices through a microscopic ear, if that's possible. 'Twas fun and many thanks to Scott and the other fellas, Doug, Matt, and Paul.

For your listening pleasure...listen at your own risk. j/k ;) http://www.scottwilderweb.com/page1/page7/page7.html

Amy's 30th

We went to the Claddagh for dinner and then bowling for Amy Riego's 30th birthday party. The food was good, and the Bailey's cheesecake was beautiful!

Greg liked the plaque in the party room that he thought his mother would like. She never knows a stranger, always making new friends. :)

At the bowling alley, I didn't capture Greg's many strikes on film, or the 3 times he had to rescue my ball that got stuck in the gutter. But I did catch Amy blowing out the candles on her cake. She needed some help from her cousin Nancy.

It was a fun, yet exhausting night. Who knew you had to be in such great shape for bowling? With Greg's great coaching, I threw 2 strikes in 2 games! :) WooHoo!! I think I've overcome my fear of bowling from when I was 9 yrs. old at the bowling alley in Mosquite, TX, w/ my dad and the 9 lb. ball slipped off of my hand and I flung it backwards into the seats where his friends and their kids were sitting. I was SO embarrassed, I didn't want to ever bowl again! No mishaps like that one this time, but I only used a 10 lb. ball. :)

Girls Night Out

Tonight we're going to Broad Ripple to Mama Carolla's for some good Italian cuisine. I can't wait! This wet weather needs some warm comfort food to keep me smilin'. I hear it's romantic. Maybe Greg and I will try it sometime.

My Johari Window

Arena (known to self and others) friendly, helpful, intelligent, observant, self-conscious, sympathetic	Blind Spot (known only to others) able, caring, cheerful, complex, dependable, energetic, giving, idealistic, independent, kind, logical, loving, nervous, proud, reflective, relaxed, religious, responsive, searching, sentimental, tense, trustworthy, warm
Façade (known only to self)	Unknown (known to nobody) accepting, adaptable, bold, brave, calm, clever, confident, dignified, extroverted, happy, ingenious, introverted, knowledgeable, mature, modest, organised, patient, powerful, quiet, self-assertive, sensible, shy, silly, spontaneous, wise, witty

All Percentages

able (15%) accepting (0%) adaptable (0%) bold (0%) brave (0%) calm (0%) caring (38%) cheerful (38%) clever (0%) complex (15%) confident (0%) dependable (7%) dignified (0%) energetic (23%) extroverted (0%) friendly (30%) giving (15%) happy (0%) helpful (23%) idealistic (15%) independent (7%) ingenious (0%) intelligent (30%) introverted (0%) kind (30%) knowledgeable (0%) logical (7%) loving (15%) mature (0%) modest (0%) nervous (7%) observant (46%) organised (0%) patient (0%) powerful (0%) proud (7%) quiet (0%) reflective (15%) relaxed (7%) religious (38%) responsive (7%) searching (7%) self-assertive (0%) self-conscious (7%) sensible (0%) sentimental (30%) shy (0%) silly (0%) spontaneous (0%) sympathetic (23%) tense (7%) trustworthy (15%) warm (30%) wise (0%) witty (0%)

Created by the Interactive Johari Window on 9.3.2006, using data from 13 respondents.
You can make your own Johari Window, or view pollyannabay's full data.